Text Lingo Every Parent Should Know

Whether we’re talking about text lingo, friending people online or the pictures our kids post online, the best tool to minimize risky behavior online is our active involvement.  Most children, teens included, say that their parents are the strongest influence over the decisions they make.

But even kids that have active parents make mistakes and sometimes we have to protect our kids from other people.  Therefore it is important that you are at least familiar with some of the text lingo terms that would indicate your child could be headed for trouble.  Here is a small sample:

Text LingoAt KidSafe we regularly hear from parents that said they simply couldn’t remember the thousands of text lingo terms currently being used by kids.  KidSafe automatically translates text lingo into a language parents can understand and then our advance parental intelligence system will notify you if inappropriate, dangerous or suspicious behaviors or people are identified in your child’s digital world. We would love your feedback on the service so take a moment to create an account and tell us what you think.

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Tim Woda is a passionate advocate for protecting children from today’s scariest digital dangers – cyberbullying, sexting and predators. He co-founded KidSafe, is the author of Keeping Kids Safe: A Guide for Parents of Social and Mobile Children and is a frequent public speaker on the topic.

Kids, Texting and Text Lingo

Are you concerned that your child’s thumbs might fall off as a result of sending too many text messages?  Well join the club. If your home is anything like mine than you’re seeing the number of text messages being sent and received by your child head steadily upwards.  The average American teen now sends or receives one text message every nine minutes!

Text messaging is no longer just another way to connect with one another; it has become a cultural phenomenon.  Parodies on television of teens and tweens texting to one another while in the same room are funny because we can all imagine our own children doing the same thing. We’re asked to text in our vote to American Idol.  Barak Obama won the White House, in part, because of his team’s ability to engage young voters via text messaging.  The Pew Internet & American Life Project recently confirmed what every parent with a teenager already knows – texting has become the preferred channel of basic communication between teens and tweens and their friends.

Text messaging, officially called Short Message Service (SMS), has grown in popularity with teens for three primary reasons:

  1. Texting is a more efficient and a faster way to communicate than a voice phone call,
  2. The cost of messaging plans has steadily declined,
  3. Sending a text message is similar to passing a note in class – it is a discreet method of communicating with friends.

For parents and educators, it is this last statement that represents a challenge.  Let’s start with the obvious.  Why did we pass notes in class when we were kids?  If we’re being honest with ourselves than we can acknowledge that we were communicating something that we either didn’t want others to hear or we shouldn’t have been communicating at that particular moment at all.  Passing notes in class was our attempt at convert communications.

Text messaging has many benefits, it is here to stay and most text messages our children send or receive represent perfecting acceptable content.  I have nothing against text messaging.  That said, this chart illustrates, a staggering percentage of our children admit to using text messaging inappropriately.

Perhaps even more alarming is what Local, State and Federal law enforcement is seeing as a skyrocketing trend.  Child predators are now increasingly using text messaging to communicate directly with our children often right under our noses. Predators are always going to go where the children are and the preferred method of communication by kids is text messaging.

Risks and threats to our kids’ well-being have been a part of life since the beginning of time.  But it is important for us to accept a very simple truth – texting messaging and kids can be a risky combination without active parental involvement.

Introduction to Text Lingo

While the smart phones are capable of sending long text messages, less advanced mobile phones can only accommodate messages of 160 characters. This limitation naturally led users to try to use the fewest number of characters possible to convey a comprehensible message.

To cut the character count of a text message, users often use abbreviations and ignore punctuation and traditional grammar. For words which have no common abbreviation, users commonly remove the vowels from a word, or use pictures or a single letter or number to represent whole words.  Eventually entire phrases were reduced to acronyms.  Today, text lingo (also known as SMS language, Textese, chatspeak, chat lingo or net lingo) is a commonly used and well understood language by most teens and, to a lesser degree, technology-savvy adults.

Most of us are familiar with the regular, more harmless codes like LOL (laughing out loud) and ttyl (talk to you later) and a few others here and there. But as I said, text lingo is an entire language and most parents don’t speak text lingo fluently.  This opens the door to much risk but understanding the risk is the first step in managing it.  Allow me to share a sample conversion with you:

Sample Text Lingo Conversation

Surprised?  Stunned?  As this conversation illustrates, text lingo is not only more efficient than writing out entire messages, it also makes it possible for some pretty troublesome conversations to take place right under our nose.  Kids and child predators alike are able to engage in conversations that few parents would be able to understand.  Text lingo has become so mainstream with kids that it is now used in email, on social networking websites and when chatting with instant messaging services like AIM® and Yahoo Messanger®.

Talking to Kids in a Language We All Understand

Whether we’re talking about text lingo, the traditional written word or picture our kids put online, the best tool at your disposal to decrease risky behavior is your active involvement.  The earlier we start talking to our children about the decisions they make online and with their mobile phone the better.  Our children need to understand what our expectations are and what we consider “out of bounds”.  Most children, teens included, say that their parents are the strongest influencers over the decisions they make.  Just because we don’t speak in text lingo doesn’t mean that we cannot talk to our child about using the language appropriately.

Text messaging and text lingo are going to be a part of our kids’ life long into the future just like social networking, having a bank account, using a credit card, driving a car, etc. With consistent guidance on text messaging and text lingo from mom and dad, you have every reason to expect that mistakes will be less frequent and less severe. ______________________________________________________________

Tim Woda is a passionate advocate for protecting children from today’s scariest digital dangers – cyberbullying, sexting and predators. He co-founded KidSafe, is the author of Keeping Kids Safe: A Guide for Parents of Social and Mobile Children and is a frequent public speaker on topics related to technology and child safety.

Copyright © 2009-2010 Tim Woda

“Don’t Talk to Strangers” Isn’t Such Old-Fashioned Advice After All

In March, Ashleigh Hall’s name was splashed across newspapers everywhere after her body was found in a ditch. The 17-year-old had done something that a worrisome number of teens do: made a new friend on Facebook and gone to meet him.

A 2006 survey commissioned by Cox Communications with the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children reported that:

  • 71% of teens reported receiving messages online from someone they don’t know
  • 45% have been asked for personal information by someone they don’t know
  • 30% have considered meeting someone that they’ve only talked to online
  • 14% have actually met a person face-to-face that they’ve only talked to on the Internet (the figure for teens ages 16 and 17 jumps to 22%)

In Ashleigh’s case, her new friend was a predator who had lied about his identity, posing as a 17-year-old boy. Many were quick to point fingers at Facebook: can’t they do more to prevent people from lying about who they are online?

Check out www.kidsafe.me/blog for the rest of this article and practical tips for helping you educate, engage and protect your children.

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______________________________________________________________

Tim Woda is a passionate advocate for protecting children from today’s scariest digital dangers – cyberbullying, sexting and predators. He co-founded KidSafe, is the author of Keeping Kids Safe: A Guide for Parents of Social and Mobile Children and is a frequent public speaker on the topic.

Copyright © 2009 Tim Woda

Understanding ESRB Ratings

The ESRB (Entertainment Software Rating Board) is a non-profit organization that assigns computer and video game content ratings, enforces industry-adopted advertising guidelines and helps ensure responsible online privacy practices for the interactive entertainment software industry.  The ESRB was started so consumers, especially parents, could make informed purchasing decisions.

The ESRB Rating is made up of two equally important parts:  Rating Symbol and Content Descriptors.  This two-part approach provides parents with a more granular understanding of the games they might buy and the ones their kids are playing – online and off.

image source: www.esrb.org

Ratings Symbols

Rating Symbols appear on the front of the game box.  These symbols suggest age appropriateness for the game.  The following is a description for each Rating Symbol.

EC (Early Childhood).  These games are for children 3 and older.  When reviewed, parents found no unsuitable content for children.

E (Everyone). These games are for children 6 years of age or older.  May contain mild violence or mild language.

E10+ (Everyone 10 and older). These games are appropriate for children 10 years or older.  May contain mild violence, mild language or minimal suggestive themes.

T (Teen). These games are suitable for children 13 years or older.  They may contain violence, suggestive language, gambling, and/or use of strong language .

M (Mature). These games are for children 17 years or older.  They may contain blood, gore, extreme violence and language, and/or sexual content.

AO (Adults Only). These games are for persons 18 years or older.  They include prolonged scenes of violence, strong sexual content and nudity.

RP (Rating Pending). This symbol is when a game is awaiting rating.  Only seen in advertising prior to game being released.

Important Note: Even if a game has been rated for younger kids, players may still have the ability to chat online with other gamers during game-play.  Be sure to check out all game options and all privacy settings when your child wants to try out a new game.

Content Descriptors

Content Descriptors appear on the back of a video game next to the rating symbol and often in the footer of an online game’s website.  These descriptors indicate elements in a game that may have triggered a particular rating and/or may be of interest or concern.  There are 30 unique descriptors including, “Animated Blood”, “Crude Humor”, “Intense Violence”, “Strong Lyrics” and “Use of Tobacco”.

So next time your child asks you to pick up a new game, flip the game over and look for the rating.  If they want to play an online game, check out the website first to make sure the site is following industry standards to help you protect your child.  If there is no ESRB Rating, you might want to consider a different game.  ESRB Ratings make it easy for you to make an informed decision about the age-appropriateness of the game for your child.

To learn more about ESRB Ratings, visit www.esrb.org.

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______________________________________________________________

Tim Woda is a passionate advocate for protecting children from today’s scariest digital dangers – cyberbullying, sexting and predators. He co-founded KidSafe, is the author of Keeping Kids Safe: A Guide for Parents of Social and Mobile Children and is a frequent public speaker on the topic.

Copyright © 2009 Tim Woda

Xbox 101: What Every Parent Needs to Know

Xbox.  Xbox 360.  Xbox LIVE.  What’s the difference between these systems and what do we need to know as parents.  Let’s start with the basics.

When I was a kid “social gaming” meant sitting around with your friends on beanbag chairs, waiting for your turn at Pac-Man with the one joy stick we had.  The definition of “social gaming” for our children’s generation is very different.

Today, our children can pick up their controller and play a game of Halo with someone 1,000 miles away by connecting online.  They can check to see if their friends are “online” and join them in “multi-player mode”, all while sitting on beanbag chairs in different houses.  The world of gaming is changing rapidly and as parents we need to change the image we have of how kids play video games.

Microsoft’s Xbox is just one example of “social gaming”.    These systems allow the user to connect online through your homes internet connection to download new games, chat or play with others users, download and watch movies, or even share photos.

So what is the difference between Xbox’s systems?

Xbox – Developed by Microsoft and released in 2001.  Xbox is the original gaming system’s name.  It allows up to 4 player controllers.  In 2002, Microsoft announced the Xbox LIVE which would allow players to connect to others online.

Xbox 360 – This is the second gaming console released by Microsoft in 2005.  It is the “successor” of the Xbox.

Xbox LIVE – Microsoft’s Xbox LIVE is basically the online service for Xbox or Xbox 360.  Xbox Live is a paid subscription to Microsoft’s online gaming and content distribution service.  It allows the player to play against others online, chat with friends from school or people they meet on Xbox LIVE, download and trade photos and even download new games, movies and television shows.  When a player registers for LIVE, they create what is called their GAMERTAG, which is a “nickname” that will be displayed on Xbox LIVE so other players can see what games you play, how well you play them.  It is like a screen name.

If you are thinking about connecting your child’s Xbox to the Internet or already have a child connected, remember, as soon as your child is connected, the gaming console becomes a social networking tool.  In fact, Xbox Live recently gave users the ability to interact directly with Facebook and Twitter.  If you have parental control software on your family computers, that will not limit access to these sites if accessed through Xbox LIVE.

Without the internet connection, the Xbox and Xbox 360 are just like the games we grew up with – only with much better games (sorry Pac-Man).  You can only play with the people physically located in the same room.

Understanding the Risks

Online gaming is fun, exciting and today it is a part of childhood.  Inherently there is nothing wrong with it.  But just like any other place our children connect to the Internet, there is only one-degree of separation between our children and those intent on doing our children harm.  Parents need to understand the risks.

In Portsmouth, Virginia a 24 year old man was arrested and charged with a felony after asking for nude photos of a 13 year old via the Xbox LIVE.  In Saratoga Springs, New York a 20 year old man was arrested after finding the address of a 15 year old girl and sending her packages and flowers and sending thousands of text messages through her cell phone.  The parents of the girl refused all of the packages and changed the cell phone number, but the predator did not stop there.  He drove to her home and after finding the new cell phone number, sent text messages threatening to “rape” her and her little sister.  Cyberbullying is rampant!

Last night I had the opportunity to spend three hours in the FBI’s Washington field office with their Child Exploitation Task Force.  One of my key take-aways the meeting was that in their opinion, parents are simply not aware of the risks their children are exposed to online.  For one reason or another, few parents think bad things are going to happen to their child.  They think their child is too smart, too careful, too responsible, etc.  Predators are experts at finding our children.  They always go where the children are.  They are experts at approaching them and “grooming” them.  And it happens to smart, careful, responsible kids everyday.  In fact, while at the FBI office, a special agent demonstrated this live for the meeting attendees.  He created a brand new online profile, pretending to be a 13 year old and went online into a chat room.  Within 60 seconds, his fake profile was being chatted up by several adults and within 10 minutes, one of the random strangers – who identified himself as a 40 year old man – had sent the child a nude photo and was speaking in a sexual manner to the “child”.

This is a Parenting Challenge, not an Xbox Challenge

It is important to understand that this is not an Xbox challenge.  This is a parenting challenge that applies to all internet-accessible devices.  The world is now wired but our kids are still kids, no matter how smart or trustworthy they are.  It is important that we educate and engage our children on an ongoing basis about how to stay safe online.   A few of very simple rules:

  1. STOP- When online strangers try engage your child, they need to STOP, meaning they should not respond.
  2. BLOCK – They should BLOCK the  stranger so that they can not continue to communicate with them
  3. TELL – Our kids need to know to TELL a trusted adult, hopefully their parent.

And of course we need to make sure our children know that they should never meet someone in real life that they met online – ever.  You might consider reviewing an Internet & Mobile Safety Pledge with your kids.

It is also critical that you have a way to supervise your children’s usage of Xbox LIVE on an ongoing basis.  Using Xbox LIVE’s parental controls complimented by a KidSafe Basic subscription should provide you with the peace of mind you need to allow your children to safely enjoy Xbox LIVE’s amazing technology while playing with family and approved friends.

Add to: Facebook | Digg | Del.icio.us | Stumbleupon | Reddit | Blinklist | Twitter | Technorati | Yahoo Buzz | Newsvine

______________________________________________________________

Tim Woda is a passionate advocate for protecting children from today’s scariest digital dangers – cyberbullying, sexting and predators. He co-founded KidSafe, is the author of Keeping Kids Safe: A Guide for Parents of Social and Mobile Children and is a frequent public speaker on the topic.

Copyright © 2009 Tim Woda
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